Walking on water

The anchoress (see below) mentions the latest explanation of Jesus walking on water: He was actually on a piece of ice...

No mention on how he managed to balance on the ice...or that ice thick enough to hold a man would be opaque...never mind, it's the annual Easter let's bash Jesus week...

But FedEx has a better explanation...

Here in Asia, there is a commercial where a Federal Express driver has to deliver a package...but there has been an accident on the bridge, and all the lanes are blocked.
So, while the voice over discusses how FedEx uses team work to deliver you packages on time, the commercial shows the FedEx driver grabbing the package and walking on water across the river, while onlookers turn to look and gasp...
Then, a couple feet from the shore, you hear an angry "OWWW"...and suddenly, divers holding boxes under the water suddenly appear, including the last diver, who is angry about his fingers being stepped on...
The FedEx driver apologizes, and then goes on to deliver the package on time.
So you see, it wasn't ice.
It was FedEx...