Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Your government keeping you safe

Well, Homeland security couldn't be bothered to check up on students who the Russians warned them were terrorists planning to bomb the Boston Marathon last year, but don't worry: They will keep you safe from...chocolate easter eggs.
They can't get Mexican illegals or Dagestani terrorists en route to blow up the Boston Marathon, but they could, if only those guys made the mistake of traveling with a Kinder egg.

Mark Steyn reports how in a previous trip he ran into trouble:

"Oh, just some Easter eggs," I said, breezily - and instantly regretted it.
The hitherto somewhat somnolent agent sprang visibly alert. "Easter eggs?" he said, with a palpable menace in his voice.
"Not Kinder eggs," I replied, trying very hard not to roll my eyes. "Just regular home-made Québécois Easter chocolate."
He de-bristled, and waved us through. "Close call, Dad," said my daughter.
Indeed. I'd smuggle in a dirty nuke before I'd risk another Kinder egg in the car. Three Easters ago, the United States Government gave me a delightful seasonal gift of a Department of Homeland Security "Custody Receipt for Seized Property and Evidence". Late the previous night, crossing the self-same Quebec/Vermont border posr, my children had had two boxes of "Kinder Eggs" ("Est. Dom. Value $7.50″) confiscated by Customs & Border Protection.

1 comment:

fillyjonk said...

In my one and only bit of lawbreaking, a person I know who lives in the UK MAILED me several KinderEggs. Partly to see if they'd make it through or get confiscated.

They made it through. The chocolate isn't fantastic, but the prizes are fun. I'd buy them (45 and childless) occasionally if they were available here....but of course, we must be protected at all costs. ("Think of the children!")