Charlie

There is a lot on TV about the plans for a large state funeral of the pope...

Funerals are not for the dead, but for the living. It is a way for us to express our sorrows that we are bereft of the dead one, and a way to honor their life.

This is why it is telling that Mr. Schiavo has cremated his wife...I don't blame him for seeking a secret funeral, but why cremation? She was Catholic, after all, and Catholics don't usually cremate their dead.

Yes, I know...as Mark Steyn remarked, when the topic is brought up, the majority of Americans merely stick their fingers in their ears and say:" La, la, la...I can't hear you".

But, hold on, this is not about Terri.

This is about Charlie.

Years ago, I worked at an institution for the retarded.

One of our clients was a quiet boy in his twenties who wore a hockey helmet because he had severe seizures. Aside from this, he was "normal" looking, and from his history we suspected that his brain damage was probably due to trauma...aka child abuse...and traumatic seizures are notoriously hard to control

No matter what we did, his seizures continued.
So the Neurologist admitted him to the hospital.
Two days later, we heard one of our patients died...we were expecting a death of one client with pneumonia, but no, it was Charlie. He had a seizure and died, despite all they could do.

When we went to bury Charlie, we found he had no funeral fund. His social security checks went to his parents, not the institution...most parents used the money to buy "Goodies" and presents...alas, Charlies parents just used it.

When we contacted them for funeral instrutions, we found them both drying out at the same rehab center...and they were penniless...

So the administration decided to creamate Charley and give his ashes to his parents.It was the cheapest way to "bury" him, and that was that.

This horrified our old fashioned staff...and I heard many comments saying the parents first threw Charley away, then they wasted his money, and now they are throwing away his ashes.

I had a discussion about this with our social worker, who was trying to find a funeral director to give him a "free" funeral, and someone to donate a burial plot.

"Oh, it's too bad the monsignor isn't here any more", she commented, "He always helped us in the past".

"The Monsignor? Which Monsignor"? I asked horrified. The only local monsignor had disappeared after settling a lawsuit for molesting altar boys...

"Yes, that one". She laughed.

"I'm not a Catholic, but whenever we had to bury someone and needed help, I always called him. He wasn't a good priest morally, but he did care about our clients, and when we had a burial to do, he would donate a plot and help fund the funeral ".

This story always reminds me of the Hassadic story of the rich mean miser who once gave a poor lady an onion because he felt pity for her...and when he died, his sins were put on one side of the scale, and the onion the other....

Eventually we found a plot and a funeral director for a real funeral.

So Charlie was buried, the parents were released from the drunk tank to attend, and the staff who was Charlie's real family had a decent funeral to mourn the passing of a nice guy who they loved.

It wasn't much for a life destroyed by cruelty and lived in obscurity, but at least in death he wasn't merely thrown away by a cheap bureaucrat who didn't care.