A Codger's advice

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

* Life is simpler
when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster
than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies.
It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs,
expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived,
not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about
ain't never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes
the best answer.

* Live a good, honorable life.
Then when you get older and think back,
you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole,
the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with,
watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience,
and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier
than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence,
try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

* Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.