Sunday, May 09, 2021

I am a mother, not a birthing person

The latest insanity by those pushing a non gender agenda is insisting we don't call women who give birth mothers. We are now instructed to use the term "birthing person",

Because we don't want to hurt the feelings of maybe a half dozen women who take male hormones so they  can live as a man, but who nevertheless manage to get pregnant and deliver a child (who hopefully was not harmed by the drugs they took to transition).

 The irony  is that equating the term "birthing person" and the term "mother" insults those of us who are mothers by adoption.

Don't our feelings count?

Perhaps a dozen "men"  give birth each year, BUT WE MOTHERS WHO ADOPT NUMBER IN THE MILLIONS.

Yet for some reason no reporter of pundit seems to notice us.

Trying to destoy the word "mother" is not really about the feeings of trans people. It is actuLly part of a larger agenda to deny the importance of the family.

This can be seen in the media stories that emphsize the problems of traditional families, and the absence of mothers as role models for our girds.
 
And if stories of traditional mothers are few, well stories of mothers by adoption are even rarer.
 
Adoption is often portrayed in a negative light.
There are a lot of "poor me" stories pushed in the media about adoption, both now and in the past. Why?

Dirty little secret: Feminist often have aborted their own children in the name of independence from the patriarchy (or, alas, often because they were seduced and abandoned and don't want to admit they and their unborn child were rejected by the one they love). 

They chose not to carry their child to term for another mother to raise. This would be the loving choice, but it is hard, and hey, better to just wave a wand an throw away the child and deny it was a child, or defend that choice by saying "I would never give my child away". But in many, the choice remains an open wound in their hearts, And seeing adoptipn portrayed in a positive light opens this wound of regret.

 And when the subject comes up, they don't want other girls to think this is a choice if they don't feel they can raise their baby.

Hence so many anecdotal stories of terrible adoptive moms.

And although there is less bad press against those of us who adopted older children we are rarely seen in ordinary films or tv from the US.

And then there are the step mothers. Also who have a bad press, even though with the high rate of divorce and remarriage such mothers are common, and often have to cope with resentful children who project on them the anger against their birth mother for leaving them (sometimes from death, but more commonly from divorce).

And the really invisible mothers? The foster moms, God bless them.

Quick: Name a film or tv show where a loving foster mom took in a child with anger and acting out from the trauma of their original homes, but cared and loved for them anyway, even though they knew they dare not hope to keep the child long term.

Many foster moms are seen by these kids as the only mother who loved them.

And especially let us remember the grandparents and extended family members and family friends who take in children whose moms cannot care for them, often doing this outside the social welfare system: This type of adoption is common in poor white, ethnic and minority communities.

Sometimes this is a temporary situation, as when a single teen age mom needs to finish school. 

At other times, it is longterm due to the birthmother being sick. Or more commonly in the USA because of mom's young age makes them unable to parent the child. Alas, substance abuse and unstable lifestyle puts many children at risk so the family intervenes without getting the complicated social system involved.

https://www.rand.org/pubs/research_briefs/RB5030.html

I should note that here in the Philippines, many children are raised by extended famililies because of poverty, and because one or both parents work abroad.

So let us ignore the bullies who are trying to destroy the traditional family which is the basis of civilization.

All traditions, both East and West, see the importance of women as mothers and caregivers and as Pope Francis pointed out gender theory denies this reality and is especially a danger to the family in poor countries, where the family, not the state, is the main supplier of care for children, the aged, and the sick.

Francis published a lengthy teaching text on marriage and the family called The Joy of Love (Amoris Laetitia) in which he underscored the unique value of motherhood and fatherhood, neither of which is dispensable or replaceable with a unisex version of “parent.” He also said that the “legal deconstruction of the family” taking place in many countries cannot bode well for the future of society. 

Those insisting on using the word "birthing person" are just part of this modern day insanity, so they should be ignored and corrected, and the twitter mobs that attack anyone who says otherwise should also be ignored.

Let us instead honor the word "Mother": which includes those who birth the children and care for them. Not just the mothers who carried them in their wombs and gave birth to them, but the other mothers who took them in and cared for them out of love.



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